The Sexual Hang-ups of Mayor Ireton, Part III

Poor Mayor Ireton...getting frustrated every step of the way in his personal war on adult businesses.  First, he didn't get his way of trying to force The Red Light District Romantic Superstore to change its name.  Second, he didn't get to collect all the fines he assessed the business for not complying with his wishes.  Adding insult to injury, the District Court dropped the criminal charges he brought against the business forcing him to admit he had an ineffectual legal team and backwoods laws that rich city folk could easily circumvent. 

His sideshow and personal War on Sex efforts aren't done.  We'll see if he's going for strike three.

Instead of forming a new legal team and strengthening Salisbury's laws to prevent abuses by outside businesses, Mayor Ireton has decided it's time to redefine sex and where it will be allowed to be sold.  Specifically, he wants to redefine an adult business as one that devotes 15% of floor space to adult items and whose sales of adult merchandise totals 15% or more of total sales - both down from the current 20% definition.  He hopes the move will force these businesses out of residential areas and away from Churches.

Ok, for you folks who aren't familiar with Salisbury or Delmarva, you pretty much can't throw a dead cat while blindfolded without hitting a Church.  Mayor Ireton is hellbent on making Salisbury a sexless city by adding a Church in the mix.

This can't be "adult" because a
big name is behind her
Of course, Mayor Ireton has never clearly stated why he thinks adult stores are bad for Salisbury and so we're left guessing.  Victoria's Secret is an adult store, albeit soft porn adult store, but he's not complaining about their presence in the Salisbury Mall.  In fact, by Google Maps, there are three Churches circling the mall and three more directly across the highway from the mall.  (Told you you can't throw a dead cat without hitting a Church.)  Surely he has to be defining "adult store" as something more than a store that only sells lingerie, panties, and bras while flaunting half-naked models to sell the merchandise.

Let's assume, for the sake of argument, that adult stores are as bad as Mayor Ireton thinks they are - Victoria's Secret not included.  It would make sense that he push for an ordinance that would require any new Churches be built next to adult stores as well as other "objectionable" businesses like liquor stores, smoking and vap stores, drug rehab centers, and eventually, pot stores when pot is finally legalized.  Wouldn't we want a Church around all these questionable businesses to help the customers who frequent these businesses find the spiritual guidance and fulfillment they may need?  Afterall, that is the Churches' mission - to save lost souls. 

If not enough new Churches are being built to partner with each of these types of objectionable businesses, why not require all new, objectionable businesses be built within 1,000 feet of an existing Church?  Heck, for good measure, let's throw in nursing homes, too.  With Churches next door to all these businesses the trip to the train station to Heaven would be a lot shorter, and, for those "objectionable" customers - those who shop at adult stores, liquor stores, or are in rehab - their trip to the elevator down will get them out of Salisbury a lot quicker.

All funning aside, zoning laws are generally a good idea, but micro-zoning is a bad idea.  Unfortunately, micro-zoning is a prevalent practice.  There's a reason why Wal-Marts never open in the vicinity of wealthy neighborhoods despite the fact many of the wealthy frequent Wal-Marts.  If you look at all the land use objections (the "not in my backyard" conflicts), almost all, if not all, arise in neighborhoods with average incomes of around the upper five figures to lower six figures, but far less than seven figures.  Poorer neighborhoods - those with an average income considered lower middle class or poorer - simply accept that a business has a right to open its doors even if it's a business of "objectionable", but legal, merchandise or service.

Here's the bottom line.  Mayor Ireton needs to get off his moral high horse and allow the free market to decide which businesses will thrive or die wherever the business open its doors.  His only concern should be if the business meets the zoning concerns of the area such as hours of operation, traffic concerns, noise levels, parking availability, and the like.  Moral concerns like, "Is this the type of business we want" should be no concern of his.  If the citizens don't want it, the business will eventually close its doors.

As long as Victoria's Secret is allowed to operate in the Salisbury Mall, unchallenged, Mayor Ireton needs to get his house in order and clearly define "adult business" to include a definition of what "adult merchandise" is.  Until he gets the definition of "adult merchandise" down pat, Mayor Ireton is nothing more than one man trying vaguely to impose his own moral standards on an entire city.


For the TL;DR folks:
Mayor Ireton has taken it upon himself to dictate to you what is an acceptable business that you should have access to.


For your listening pleasure:





Related links:
The sexual hang-ups of Mayor Ireton
The sexual hang-ups of Mayor Ireton, Part II


Posted by Five Drunk Rednecks

Comments